I have spent the last ten years of my life working with families
who have lost a loved one. I heard numerous "stories"
from families about signs from their deceased love one. I have to
admit I didn't believe in "signs from beyond." I felt
it was a way for very sad people to make themselves feel better.
Then my father died on Wednesday at 11:13 p.m. The next day it
was suppose to rain all day. We woke up; however, to sunshine. My
husband remarked that Dad had given us a nice day but he felt Dad
would shake it up before the day was over. Well he was right. Around
5:00 p.m. it started thundering and lightening. It was a short storm.
All of a sudden my mom looked out of the window and there was the
most beautiful double rainbow. In fact that was the first double
rainbow I had ever seen. The colors were bright and beautiful and
you could see end to end on both rainbows. My mom with tears in
her eyes said that Dad sent that rainbow. He is okay.
That rainbow and my Mom's explanation made me feel better but I
didn't really consider it a sign. Then... my Mom was going through
the attic the Saturday before Mother's Day and found the letters
my Dad had written to her when he was in service in World War II.
There were stacks and stacks of letters. My Mom pulled a letter
from one stack and started reading. In the service my Dad was a
fighter pilot. In this letter he told my Mom that he had seen a
rainbow when flying that day. He said that it was the most beautiful
sight he had ever seen. He wrote that in the air a rainbow is a
full circle. He promised that some day he would show her a rainbow
...I truly believe he did.
The second incident happened at my parent's house on Friday. Years
ago I was kidding my Dad about my inheritance. My Dad reached in
his pocket and gave me a quarter (which I still have). He told me
to invest it wisely. Then it became the standing joke that I got
my inheritance but my brother Gary did not. While cutting my parents
grass, Gary noticed something in the grass and picked it up. Believe
it or not my brother found a quarter.
Maybe someone out there is like I was... a non believer. Call
these two incidences just coincidence — call them what you like.
I call them "signs" and I will never doubt another family's
"signs" and stories. I believe in God, I believe in the
resurrection, and now I believe that God allows our loved one to
send comfort through signs. Don't be afraid to believe.
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
may I call you Anon? Your letter is remarkable for a number
of reasons; first, that it happened, second that you took the time
to share it, and third, your Dad is clearly looking out for his
wife and kids. To be at a place in life where we are nonbelievers
is normal, natural, and necessary. The same words I use to talk
about grief. You had a natural experience through the expression
of nature that sounds simply exquisite. How lucky you are! But not
just for the experience of the rainbow connection, but even more so
to have had this guy for a dad and friend and guide and mentor all
your life. Think about it - each and every day from the moment of
conception forward, you had this man to call Dad. He served our
country, sacrificed as a prisoner of war, served his wife and kids,
and in the process of all that he served his God. This man was an
everyday common good man, and in that he was a hero. Your hero.
He taught you well. Just look at the words you close with; "Don't
be afraid to believe. "
What more can I say?
Thank you for being your Dad's kid; and thanks go out to your
Dad for being, well... him.
God Speed Your Grief Journey,
Patrick Dean, MEd Director of Grief Education Services